Managing Difficult People. RCCG Sunday School Teachers.

Memory Verse: “Its an honour for a man to cease from strife; but every fool will be meddling”– Prov. 20:3.

Bible Passage: Genesis 13:7-11. 

Lesson Introduction

A difficult person may be one who is snubbish , argumentative, quarrelsome, selfish, insensitive or rude. Difficult people seem to know just how to “push one’s buttons’ and stir up trouble. By difficult persons, we mean people with certain personality traits or emotional characteristics that makes it difficult for you to relate with them. Difficult people can take many forms , however, it is expedient to learn how to manage them.

LESSON AIM : To study how to manage difficult people.

Teaching Objectives

Through this lesson, students should be able to:

a. Understand how to identify difficult people.

b. Discuss how to manage difficult people.

Teaching Plan

To achieve the above stated objectives, the teacher should: 

TEXT REVIEW: Genesis 13:7-11.

Genesis 13:7: The Bible records that “there was strife between the herdsmen of Abraham cattle and herdsmen of Lot’s cattle.

-The teacher should identify five things Abraham did to curtail the strife from Genesis 13:8-12.

i………………………………………

ii……………………………………………

iii…………………………………………..

iv…………………………………

v…………………………………………..

Teaching Method : Discussion Method. 

Time Management : 60% of the teaching time can be allocated to outline one while the remaining 40% should be allocated to outline two. 

LESSON OUTLINES

1. IDENTIFYING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

2. HOW TO MANAGE DIFFICULT PEOPLE 

LESSON OUTLINE ONE: IDENTIFYING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

1. The Downers: Those who always have something bad to say; they complain, criticise and judge (2 Samuel 6:20-21).
2. The Better Tanks: Also known as “Know it all”. They are arrogant and usually think their opinion is superior on every issue. When they are wrong, they get defensive (1 Sam. 2:3). 
3. The Passives: Also known as “Push-overs”. They do not contribute much to conversations or people around them as others do the hard work. 
4. The Snipers: These are quick attackers . During interactions, they use rude comments , biting mockery or insults that cut people down (Nehemiah 3:17;4:3).
5. The Blame Gamers: Those who shift blames or give excuses for their wrongdoings rather than trying to resolve a problem (Genesis 3:9-12). 
6. The Yes People: They agree to every commitment , yet rarely deliver. You cannot trust them to follow through (Matt. 21:28-30).
7. The No People: They are quick to point out why something will not work. They are inflexible (2 Kings 7:1-2). 
8. The Dictators: They bully and intimidate and they are constantly demanding and brutally critical (2 Chro. 32:9-15). 
9. The Grenade person” This person after a brief period of calm , explodes into unfocused, ranting and raving about things that have nothing to do with the present circumstances (Matt. 2:16). 
10. The perfectionist: Someone who is unwilling to settle for anything that is not perfect or does not meet extremely high standards. 

LESSON OUTLINE TWO: HOW TO MANAGE DIFFICULT PEOPLE

A. The teacher should point out that beleivers’ response to difficult people should model the examples provided by Jesus.

B. The teacher should explain how to manage difficult people as indicated below:

1. Be calm. Avoid loosing your temper or flaring up at difficult people (Prov. 14:29).
2. Understand  the persons’ intentions. Try to identify the person’s trigger. Find out what makes them act difficult. (1 Thess. 5:21). 
3. Do a background check. Find out how others have been relating with the person. (Eccl. 1:13). 
4. Let the person know your intention. Sometimes people are resistant because they think you are being difficult with them (Col. 4:8).
5. Build a rapport. Try to establish a closer relationship with the person and learn about their families, hobbies, important dates etc. (Prov. 18:24). 
6. Go to a higher authority for resolution. Sometimes , the way to get along with the person may be through the top-down approach (Matt. 18:15-17).
7. Apply godly wisdom . Sometimes , wisdom demands that you learn how to avoid conflict with a difficult person or know when to walk away.

C. The teacher should caution students against becoming the difficult person themselves (Prov. 22:3). 

CLASS ACTIVITY 2: How do you ensure that you do not become a difficult person while attempting to manage difficult persons?

SUMMARY: A wise man foresees evil and avoid being involved in it. (Prov. 22:3). To have adequate knowledge about a thing is not sufficient but to apply the knowledge appropriately. 

CONCLUSION: Dealing with difficult people is an exercise in patience, love, and grace.

EVALUATION: Mention seven ways to manage difficult people.

CLOSING PRAYER: Almighty Father, help jme to manage difficult people in Jesus name.

ASSIGNMENT: Mention five (5) practical ways you have employed in handling difficult people (No Mark).