Memory Verse: ” Through wisdom is a house built, and by understanding it is established “. – Prov 24:3.

Bible Passage: Prov. 5: 3-4. 

Lesson Introduction

God invented marriage for companionship, sexual intimacy, procreation and invariably fulfilment. (Gen. 2:18; 21:24). However, what becomes of marriage depends primarily on the understanding of the couple of what marriage should be and the factors that positively and negatively influence such understanding. (Prov. 24:4-4).

 How a couple manages such influence(s) determines whether or not there will be happiness, peace, progress, etc. We shall, therefore, address some of these marriage influencers in this lesson. 

LESSON OUTLINE ONE: NEGATIVE INFLUENCERS

#1 FRIENDS IN TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS

Couples must protect their marriage from failure by avoiding destructive relationship patterns sponsored by third parties whose marriages seem not to be working (1 Cor. 15:33; Ps. 1:1). 

#2 Inordinate pursuit of money career

Money is needed to run the affairs of the home but when it is being pursued at the expense of the marriage. It may affect the togetherness of the couple (1 Tim 6:10). 

#3 Undue attention to social media

Communication becomes hampered when spouses pay more attention to social media activities than to each other (Matt. 6:21). This has disrupted family intimacy.

#4 Character defects

One of the factors that makes marriage beautiful is change. However, when spouses refuse to admit the need for a change in a defective lifestyle, such a marriage suffers needless tension. (Matt. 7:3).

#5 Close relationship with ex-lovers and the opposite sex

Failure to redefine and detach fully from previous or recent intimate relationships with the opposite sex can trigger unforeseen sexual immorality ( Prov. 5:3, 15,20). 

#6 Excessive jealousy

This happens when a partner is over-possessive. This is dangerous and can lead to destructive behaviours ( Prov. 6:34). 

#7 Addictions

Habits like gambling, alcohol consumption, drug abuse, and the like are some moral vices that can draw the heart of either of the partners away from the marriage.

Lesson Outline Two: Positive Influencers

1. Trust and understanding (1 John 4:8; 1 Peter 3:7). 

2. Selfless and mutual support (Gal. 6:2; Eccl. 4:9-10).

3. Praying together and keeping Christ the centre of the relationship (Matt. 18:19; Ps. 127:1). 

5. Building a new home and family culture together (Gen. 2:24). 

6. Guarding and managing ypur thoughts (Prov. 4:23; 23:7).

7. Finding work-family balance (Romans 1:11; Ps. 127:2). 

8. Never go to bed angry (Eph. 4:26).

9. Speaking kind and uplifting words to each other (Prov. 15:1; Col. 4:6). Do not nag ( Prov 21:19). 

10. Being reasonable with family finance and budget (Prov. 16:21). 

Conclusion

Every marriage is a work in progress. Therefore, we must be intentional to make it work.