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Opposite-Sex Friendship. RCCG Sunday School Teachers.


Opening Prayer: Father, help me to make you my standard.

Previous Knowledge: The teacher should allow the assistant teacher to review the lesson the previous week.

Bible Passage: Romans 12:9-10; Proverbs 6:27-28. 

Memory Verse: “But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfil its lusts”-Romans 13:14. 

Lesson Introduction

Christian youths come together for diverse reasons such as academic activities, business/social engagements, spiritual exercises and so on. In the process, making friends with the opposite sex may be inevitable. This is not a sin as long as the motive is pure(friendship with no sting attached). However, it becomes an issue of concern when we consider the common mistakes foreseeable. We shall attempt to unravel some of the mistakes as well as discuss some of the tips for a pure friendship with the opposite sex. 

Lesson Aim: To Teach Youths and young adults how to handle opposite-sex friendships.

Teaching Objectives: Through this study, youths and young adults should be able to:

a. Identify common mistakes they make in opposite-sex friendships.

b. Discover how to have pure friendship with the opposite sex. 

TEACHING PLAN: To achieve the above-stated objectives, the teacher should: 

a. Allow the students to recite the memory verse, read the Bible passage, contribute to the discussion, and do class and assignments.

b. Allow the Assistant Teacher to see to the well-being of the class, and mark attendance and assignment. 

c. Teach the lesson outlines, summarise, conclude, evaluate the lesson and give assignments to the students.


TEXT REVIEWS: Romans 12:9-10; Prov. 6:27-28

In Romans 12 verses 9 to 12, the Apostle Paul admonishes believers to:

i. Let love be without hypocrisy v9a.

ii. Hate…………………………v9b.

iii. Cling ……………………………v9c.



B. In Proverbs 6:27-28, the writer raises two fundamental questions proverbially:

i. Can a man take fire to his bosom………………………v27.



TEACHING METHOD: Discussion method. 

TIME MANAGEMENT: The teacher should apply a two-lesson outline teaching time. 




Teachers should allow the class to bear their minds on the opposite sex relationship and emphasise the following points. 

A. Here are some of the common mistakes youth make as they relate with their friends of the opposite sex.

  1. Ignoring proper boundaries. 
  2. Misrepresenting the attention of the opposite sex.
  3. Tolerating too much in the friendship and hanging on too long.
  4. Giving a blind eye to danger signals such as emotional attraction, attempting to touch a sensitive part of the body, holding hands, cuddling, pecking and so on (Prov. 6:27-28; Romans 12:1).
  5. Getting involved much too soon and going too far such as involvement in family functions, financial/business commitment and so on.
  6. Ignorantly sending potential spouses away.

CLASS ACTIVITY 1: Students should share their experiences in relating to the opposite sex. 



  1. Define the friendship and set clear boundaries. 
  2. Never assume anything but ask questions when in doubt.
  3. Do not allow anyone to form a canopy over your life under the pretence of friendship. 
  4. Do not take advantage of your closeness to your friend to seduce him/her into any dirty game or romantic pleasure (1 Thess. 5:22; Col. 2:21).
  5. Differentiate friendship from intimacy.
  6. Do not always seek to be in lonely places or dark corners with a friend of the opposite sex. 
  7. Try and include others in activities instead of isolating yourself with one person.
  8. Make a priority of same-sex friendship. Your bosom friendship should not be of the opposite sex. You can have them as close friends but not as closest friends. 
  9. Seek the opportunity to serve and not be served or entertained. Real friendship is not on what you can get from others but on how to serve others. In service, we find true friendship (Romans 12:10-11). 
  10. If you are in a relationship leading to marriage, make sure your partner meets with your opposite-gender friend.
  11. Guard your heart. Do not allow premature romance to ruin your heart, which is the centre of your destiny (Prov. 4:23). 
  12. Keep everything strictly platonic(surface and plain friendship). 

CLASS ACTIVITY 2: Students should discuss the importance of keeping opposite-sex friendships pure. 


SUMMARY: Youths and Young adults should beware of common mistakes that can ruin their friendship with the opposite sex and make up their minds to keep their friendship pure.

CONCLUSION: Prioritise same-sex friendship. If you must have a friend of the opposite gender, know your boundaries and make sure you talk about them.

EVALUATION: The teacher should ask students to mention some mistakes youth make in opposite-sex friendships. 



  1. What are the common mistakes some youths make with friends of the opposite sex?
  2. Mention at least seven (7) tips for pure friendship among youths of the opposite sex.



Check through your relationship with friends of the opposite sex and apply the tips you have learned to keep the friendship pure (No mark). 




Action Point
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I know you might agree with some of the points raised in this article. You might disagree with some of the issues raised. Let me know your views about the topic discussed. We would appreciate it if you can drop your comment. Thanks in anticipation.


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